It’s not just in the mornings anymore. It’s all day long. All week long. All weekend long. Without ceasing or, ironically, tiring. I’m just tired of being tired.

I’m sure many of you can relate. We are all pulled in so many different directions, it seems. Maybe it’s human nature to want to be so busy. Things used to be harder, after all. We sapiens spent most of the day just trying to find or cook food and stay warm. Now we have so many conveniences and yet no free time. We might as well go back to cook stoves.

Is it lack of sleep making us so tired? How much do we need anyway? We’ve all heard eight hours a night is best, but don’t you know someone who regularly gets by on, say, four? And they seem fine? And we all know someone, like me I guess, who probably “needs” at least 12 hours. But how would I know since I’ve never had enough?

I Googled, “Why am I …” and the first suggestion was, “so tired,” so I’m obviously not alone. By the way, the second suggestion was “so gassy.” Interesting. Maybe these things are related. But I digress.

According to the interwebnet, it looks like I’m in trouble. Too many carbs, not enough exercise, not enough high quality sleep, not eating enough, eating at the wrong time, sleeping at the wrong time, not getting enough protein, not drinking enough water, too much caffeine, and too much stress. That’s a lot of things to rule out. The only one that seems fun is not eating enough. I would be happy to remedy that. However dot com, I’m reasonably sure this is not the culprit here.

Time to quit complaining and do something about it, I suppose. I imagine how my life would improve if I had more energy. I fantasize in my mind about all the productive, amazing things I would accomplish if I had more energy. I would get up at 4:00 and exercise. I would clean my house every day. I would write more and spend more time on my job, and learn to cook betterer, and plow the North forty and reroute the creek, all before supper.

Am I setting myself up for disappointment? Funny you should bring that up. I think disappointment is a perfect segue into my other point about being tired.

What a perfect word, tired. Like the tires on your car go round and round, over and over and over….when things don’t change, that’s how we feel: tired. However, being tired isn’t just a physical state. We can also be mentally or emotionally tired.

When we expect a different outcome and don’t get it, we get tired of that, too. Maybe you’re tired of reading my blabbering now. The good news there is that you can stop at any time. It’s the stuff that we can’t stop that so wears on us.

Work. Chores. Obligations. We all get tired. The best thing I know is to not think about it too much. Just get it all done, and go on, because thinking too much is the devil. It’ll drive you nuts. I’m also open to suggestions on this one. Feel free to email tips.

So if exercise will give me more energy, how do I get started when I don’t have the energy to exercise? This is like the old conundrum of how to get a job without experience and how to get experience without a job. You just gotta jump in, right? Do something, even if it’s wrong.

So what will I do today? Please tell me I’m not the only one who makes plans to get up and do something but then answers the call of the couch.

You know you have a problem when you don’t want to get up, and the first thing you tell yourself is to just get it over with so you can go back to bed.

I’m going to do it, folks. I’m going to put it all out right here to make myself accountable. I’m going to eat less, get up earlier, in bed earlier, take my vitamins (I already have them; why am I so stupid to not take them?), clean my house, cook a new meal once a week. Yes! I can do it all!

I’ll be updating you in my Journey Out of Tired sometime soon and let you know how it’s going. Until then, I leave you bleary eyed but still vertical.

A teacher and mother, Meagan Morehead Bradshaw lives on a farm in Bland County; contact her at meaganmorehead123@gmail.com.

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