Possum Philosophy: Living in a no (almost) service economy

By ROBERT CAHILL/Columnist

I remember back a few years when I was in college. (I hate saying that, it reminds me of the older men I knew as a kid and the old stories they would tell.) I’m not sure what class it was, perhaps a sociology or philosophy course, we read excerpts from a book that had just been released. I don’t remember the author’s name either but he was someone who was fashionable at the time to call a “futurist.” Now, these were folks who made a pretty fair living writing books telling everyone else what the future would be like (mostly bad news). Today, I realize these learned scholars knew no more about it than I did at the time. But they made a few bucks and gave us something to argue over in class and out.
The particular focus of a large segment of this writer’s work was that the United States would become an economy based entirely on the “service industry.” In other words, we would buy everything from somewhere else and our economy would be based on serving the wants and needs of other citizens. While he was partially right, he was not totally so, Still it has become close enough to be somewhat scary. A large segment of our economy now is based on service. For example, the communications industry, in particular, the myriad of Internet services providers and the ever-present telephone industry.
Now ladies and gentlemen, friends and neighbors, relatives and even in-laws, I’m here to say I think he was wrong. Way wrong. Now before you point out that I just said he was right and, in fact, you look at everything you buy made somewhere else and see for yourself he is right, let me say, yes he was right in theory, just not in principle. Where did this erstwhile soothsayer and prognosticator go wrong? In believing we would get service. Yeah – right—service, that non-existent element in much of today’s economy.
Years ago when something broke, you got it fixed. If it was the telephone, a quick call and a repairman was there to make things right. Cable out, just call the trouble line and someone would be right there to take care of the problem. The electricity out, it was fixed even in the middle of a raging storm. Sadly, today service is a joke, oft promised but seldom given. (Except the electricity is usually fixed ASAP, but then they charge you for your actual usage, not a monthly fee. So if it isn’t on, neither is the revenue stream for them.)
I have had two experiences in about as many weeks that sadly and painfully point out where a “new age service economy” has brought us. The first was with our Internet service. One of the things I learned when moving to rural Washington County was that access to high-speed Internet service, something we had enjoyed in Saltville for several years, was practically non-existent. The telephone company did not (and still does not) offer fiber-optic cable in this fair segment of the county. This type cable makes it capable of carrying millions of bits of data at the same time. Our choices were satellite service, good stuff, if you have Bill Gates’ type pockets of money, which naturally eliminated that or the local cable TV company. At the time, Terry and I had some need for speed (ever try to send a photograph or large document by dial-up?). Terry even more than I so she opted for cable.
At first it was terrible. Technicians were here so much I thought Terry could take them off her taxes as dependents. Finally, a call to the company president at their headquarters resulted in a fleet of trucks here constantly until it was finally fixed and fixed correctly. It had done reasonably well with only an occasional blip or burp, until late last month, June 25, I believe. I was working away on something or other for the Smyth County News & Messenger, when suddenly I had no Internet service.
I restarted the computer, did all the little tricks they suggest before you call them, and again when you finally get them, all to no avail. After some 10 minutes or so I finally reached a technician. He was a nice fellow. He had me go through all the things I had already tried once more. When that didn’t work, he said he’d send a technician. Good, get to it my man. That’s when the proverbial you-know-what hit the fan.
It seems the earliest a “SERVICE” (emphasis mine) person could get here was sometime during the day on July 2. Yes, a week later. I said that was not acceptable. He said it was all he could do. I said we pay for service. He agreed. I said waiting a week for someone to fix it is not service. He kind of stuttered and stammered but that was about it. I asked for someone higher-up. (My old friend Willy Call, when we were faced with situations such as this, always told me, “If you want a good drink of water, you have to go to the head of the stream.”)
Finally, a very pleasant woman came on. She started off with the tricks, etc., and I told her we had done those twice. I asked if there was some outage in my area. She said there was some trouble two nodes away. I asked her where that was, she was unsure. I asked where she was. (The company has a large office where the technicians are based in Glade Spring.) She said Canada. I told her I need a repairman and needed him now. After a few minutes, she said it looked like it would be July 2.
I calmly (I swear I did not shout or curse) explained that both my wife and I needed this service, or we would not pay the price for it and that being down a week was unacceptable. She said she would call someone and see if perhaps she could do better. By then I had been on the telephone for more than an hour so I was not happy. I asked when I could expect to hear back from her. She was nice, but unsure. I gave her 30 minutes to call back. If she did not return my call by then, I would once again be calling the high and mighty at corporate headquarters. She assured me she would take care of it.
After her 30 minutes passed, I decided to try their help line one last time. Another 10 minutes or so of phone trees and dead-air and I got another technician. He asked if I had tried all the tricks and I said, yes, (actually I said &^%$ yes) and he just laughed. He then asked me to try one last thing, unhook the cable from my computer and touch the probe that actually goes inside the line. I accused him (only half jokingly) of being a company assassin who was going to talk me into electrocuting myself, but he promised I would not get hurt. I did. It worked. He laughed, explaining that sometimes the cable builds static electricity that causes signal disruption and I had just discharged it. I thanked him. The following Tuesday, I received a call telling me the technician would be there some time the next day, so I cancelled it. I’m still waiting on the call from the lady in Canada.
This would have been bad enough. Then Monday, July 7, I came home to find our telephone not working. My only chance was to call for repairs using a cell phone, the service for which is not great most places and downright poor here at home. After some 30 minutes of “please hold for our next representative,” I got a fellow on the line. Let me say here, that we pay extra for line guard so that they make the service and repair whether inside the home or out.
Now, I unfortunately have been bugged by a recurring bout of bursitis in my hip, to the point that the shortest walk is quite painful. The first thing the fellow did was to ask me if I could go check the terminal box outside where the line enters my home. That did it. I was hot, tired from a 30-minute wait and aggravated to the extreme. I explained to him in no uncertain terms that whether the problem was inside or outside, it was their problem to fix and I wanted someone there immediately.
He checked the lines from his end, then said the best he could do was to have someone here between the hours of 9 a.m. and 2 p.m. on Tuesday. I had suffered enough. After explaining how totally unacceptable that was, I told him my mother-in-law is getting on in years and has health problems as do I and that we wanted that service ASAP. He promised he would mark it urgent. Just as I finally hung up, my mother-in-law stuck her head out the door (the front porch is one of the few places I can get even poor cell service) and said the telephone started working again. I waited a day, then called and canceled the service call I had placed.
So there you have it folks. That futurist was way off base. Rather than a Service Economy we live in an almost no service economy. And the next time you get really poor service just remember, it is because we allow it to be that way. 

A freelance journalist, Robert “Rocky” Cahill writes regularly for the News & Messenger. His Possum Philosophy column appears in each Saturday edition.